The Cupcake Bullies | Interview with Children’s Author Leah Stuhler
I am so excited to introduce you to my friend of over fifteen years – fellow author, blogger, AND boy mom – Leah Stuhler. Leah and I met over coffee a lifetime ago as two single girls hoping to work together in our church’s drama ministry. Today, though five states separate us, we’re still friends, working in similar fields and loving on our boys. We recently sat down to talk about her experience as an allergy mom, bullying, and her first children’s book, The Cupcake Bullies. I know you’ll love to hear what she has to say…
CHRISTINE: Leah! It is always so good to chat with you, but I am so excited to let my readers listen in today!
LEAH: I’m so happy to be here!
There is so much to talk about. You have had an exciting couple of months. You’ve been promoting your first children’s book that released at the end of last year and of course you’re also a MOM who works-from-home raising two gorgeous little boys.
They certainly keep me on my toes :).
Ha! I completely know how that goes!
Now before we dive in, give the readers a little snapshot of who you are. Tell them why you’re so fabulous :).
Aww, thank you! Well like you said my husband and I have two boys. He is a teacher and a military reservist and I have tremendous pride in the fact that we are a military family. I started blogging eight years ago, so I write for several sites and also do some freelance editing. I do work from home in the insurance industry, and as you said, I released my first book The Cupcake Bullies last year.
So yes, my plate is full!
Full of good things, of course!
Yes, but definitely full!
Alright, so The Cupcake Bullies, is really a one-of-a-kind children’s book. It highlights both allergy issues AND bullying. Why did you choose write THIS book and tell THIS story?
My oldest son has a life-threatening allergy to tree nuts. Every time we go to a birthday party I have to bring him his own cupcake because he usually can’t eat the cake that is provided at the party. He has also been made fun of at school by other children because of his allergy, so this book represents a real-life situation for him, and thousands of other children who struggle with food allergies every day.
This is such a big deal, Leah. You know Noah (my second) had several food allergies when he was younger. We are so thankful that he has grown out of most of them, but they are no joke. People who don’t deal with this on a daily basis have literally no idea. What do you wish other people/families knew about this particular struggle?
Oh man, there is SO MUCH I could say here.
One of the things I wish people realized was how severe food allergies are. I’ve encountered so many people who act as if this is a choice – and I totally get SOME dietary decisions ARE choices – but food allergies are not. This is something we deal with every single moment, of every single day. If my husband and I are not vigilant, our son could die.
I think a very common misconception people have is that if you have an Epi-pen and administer that in an emergency situation, everything will be ok. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. Epi-pens may help slow the reaction, but you can still die from anaphylaxis even after being given the Epi-pen and being treated at the hospital. The best way to protect my son, is by preventing his exposure to these allergens.
This is not only a serious condition, it’s really, really hard for the child who suffers with allergies, right?
Yes. My son has such a difficult time when he gets invited to birthday parties and can’t eat the cake and other foods like all the other kids can. It’s hard for him when we go out to eat at a restaurant and he can’t order certain foods or get dessert. It absolutely breaks my heart to hear him say how he hates his allergies and that he wishes he didn’t have them.
And this happens a lot.
I am so fortunate to have some good friends who make an effort to ask me about what he can and cannot eat. They make it a point to make a birthday cake for their children that even Giovanni can eat. It makes such a difference. Children with food allergies really just want to be included. They don’t want to be seen as an inconvenience because their friends can’t bring peanut butter and jelly or nut snacks to school. They just want to be treated like everybody else.
It’s so important to remember how a child’s feelings and emotions get involved with all of this. How can friends, family, classmates, babysitters – anybody that has a child with life-threatening food allergies in their lives – best support that child and their family?
The most important way you can offer support is by asking questions. Find out about the food allergies and then have safe foods at your house when the child or family come over. We are so used to going places and being told “no,” that it’s a wonderful feeling when you can go somewhere and finally be told “yes, this food is safe for your child.”
Another way to support food allergy families is at school. If you know a child who sits at the nut-free table at lunch, pick one or two days a week where you send a nut-free lunch in with your child so they can sit at the nut-free table as well. And please, do not become upset when your child is placed in a nut-free classroom. Try to embrace the situation instead, and see it from the child’s perspective who lives with a life-threatening allergy every day.
Bullying is a huge part of this book as it is a huge part of public discussion now. What would you like to add to this conversation as a mom and as an author?
I feel that the key to stopping bullying starts at home. Parents need to look at how they treat their own children and what they are teaching them. If we teach our kids to accept others as they are, to treat others how we wish to be treated, and to respect others, we can help stop bullying. It all begins at home.
I also think it’s important our children know that if they’re being bullied, they need to tell someone. They need to know they are not being a tattletale if they share with a teacher or parent that they are being bullied. The sooner an adult knows, the sooner the situation can be handled.
This is a conversation that needs to keep happening. It needs to be discussed at home, in schools, with parents and caregivers, teachers, and friends. I recently wrote a blog post for Columbia SC Moms Blog on bullying where I discuss many of these points and others as well. We just cannot be quiet about this. Our children need us to raise our voices – loudly – and protect them!
I am so glad that you’ve given this book to the world – for your son’s sake, for other kids who suffer with food allergies, and for children who need to understand their friends who have food allergies. What do you hope kids will take away from this book?
I hope that children with food allergies will read this book and understand they are not alone. That there are other kids just like them who deal with the same thing every day. I also hope they realize they are special – not “weird” – because they have a food allergy.
My other hope is that children who don’t have food allergies will read this book and realize that it’s not ok to bully others because they’re different. I hope this book builds empathy inside of them for friends who do have food allergies.
What do you hope teachers, parents, caregivers and others like them will take away from this book?
I hope teachers use this book in their classrooms to teach students the importance of food allergy safety. I would love for this book to be a conversation starter that helps students see how we are all different, that those differences can be celebrated, and that it is never, ever ok to bully anyone else. I hope teachers will stress to students how serious food allergies can be and that keeping their friends safe is infinitely more important than the kind of sandwich they can or cannot eat at lunch.
I hope parents and caregivers will be able to share this book with their kids who have food allergies and use it as a tool to encourage them. I see each day how my son struggles with his allergy and I know other children do as well. I hope this book can be used to comfort those children and help them through their struggles.
Leah, you are so amazing and you have given us so much to process. Thank you for taking the time to sit down with us today and share about your journey as a food allergy mom, and about your book that will certainly be a blessing to kids who have food allergies.
Absolutely! No problem.
Leah and I will actually be chatting later this week about her publishing journey, some of the ins and outs of self-publishing, and what she’s learned through this experience for all the writer-readers out there, so I hope you guys will check back for the second part of this interview! For now, go scout her out on social media and buy The Cupcake Bullies today!
About Leah
Leah is a proud military wife and boy mom of two, who writes regularly at the Columbia SC Moms Blog, Military Moms Blog, and (her personal blog) Secrets of Mommyhood. When she’s not out with the kids, blogging, or promoting her new book, she’s working from home or teaching children’s theater.
Connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, or follow the hashtag #thecupcakebulliesbook on Instagram.
About the Book
Sammy has life-threatening food allergies. When he gets invited to his best friend’s birthday party, he has to bring a different cupcake. What will the other kids think? Will Sammy and his friend stand up to the bullies that don’t understand how serious Sammy’s condition is?
Find out in The Cupcake Bullies available now on Amazon.
I am an Amazon Affiliate and affiliate links are used throughout this post. For more information please visit my disclosure page.