Cutting the Commercial out of Easter
Cutting the Commercial out of Easter is a fun, 10 minute, FREE Easter script perfect for family-friendly holiday outreaches. Complete production notes and script are included below.
A PDF download of this script can be purchased HERE.
Production Notes
Characters
DIRECTOR JAMES ATWOOD | Larger than life, overly dramatic, famed local television director/producer.
SABINA SINGH | Scriptwriter, stage manager, and general assistant to DIRECTOR ATWOOD.
MARTIN THOMPSEN | Local actor hired for the commercial shoot who also happens to be a Christian.
Props & Costumes
Bedazzled Blazer
Bedazzled Bowtie
Bullhorn
Bunny Costume
Clipboards (2)
Confetti Cannon*
Director’s Chair
Director’s Clapboard
Hairbrush
Make-up brush
Microphone
Pencil
Wig (oversize, male)
*Note | If confetti cannons are a little out of budget, try using bagged confetti and have SABINA awkwardly try to throw it over MARTIN’S head instead of the cannon.
Setting
A television studio set decorated with fun, vibrant colors, and Easter props. All recording and technical equipment for the commercial shoot is imagined (but referenced as the center of the audience by characters onstage). Stage should include a partition of some kind for partial quick costume changes.
Synopsis
In Cutting the Commercial out of Easter a nearby village board has reached out to famed local television DIRECTOR JAMES ATWOOD to produce a short Easter-themed commercial for their government access channel. SABINA is the assistant for the project and MARTIN is the local talent who has been tapped to star in the shoot. Additional stagehands and/or technical assistants are imagined to be in the audience by the characters on stage.
After DIRECTOR ATWOOD and SABINA attempt two different directions for the commercial shoot with no success, MARTIN expresses his frustration with their vision, succinctly communicating the message at the very heart of Easter – that God loves us. Sketch translates nicely for outreach purposes and transitions easily into a more detailed explanation of salvation.
Script
(DIRECTOR ATWOOD buzzes onto the set with long hurried strides, holding a clipboard in one hand and a bullhorn in the other. SABINA is barely one step behind, taking two quick steps for every one of DIRECTOR ATWOOD’S. SABINA is furiously writing on a clipboard anything that DIRECTOR ATWOOD says. She nearly runs into him several times.)
ATWOOD: (Speaking through the bullhorn) Alright people! People! People! People! We’re on a tight schedule here. Time is money and money is time. I want to see everyone in their places ready to go. (aside to SABINA) Where’s the actor?
SABINA: (Checking her watch) His agent said he would be here at the top of the hour.
ATWOOD: (stops striding) It’s five ‘till. He’s already late!
SABINA: He’ll be here.
ATWOOD: We’ll I’m starting without him.
SABINA: (nods understanding) I’ll fill him in.
ATWOOD: (Steps forward and speaks to the audience through the bullhorn) Okay people, we have been given the incredible opportunity…
SABINA: (steps forward, gently) They may understand you better like this… (gesturing the bullhorn down)
ATWOOD: Right, right.
(SABINA steps back. ATWOOD raises his voice to compensate for the loss of the bullhorn.)
ATWOOD: As I was saying, we’ve been given the incredible opportunity to share with the people of this great village…
(MARTIN walks onto set bewildered. He taps SABINA on the shoulder. ATWOOD takes a giant step stage right and continues speaking.)
ATWOOD: …about community plans for the Easter holiday.
(ATWOOD begins pantomiming and speaking to the audience in jibberish about the project while MARTIN and SABINA talk.)
MARTIN: Excuse me, I’m looking for the set for the public broadcast commercial …
SABINA: (looking up from her clipboard) For the Easter shoot?
MARTIN: Yes. I can’t seem to find it.
SABINA: You’re on it. (returns to her clipboard)
MARTIN: (relieved) Oh great.
SABINA: By the way – it’s for the government access channel not PBS. That might be why you couldn’t find it. Public broadcast is in the back lot.
ATWOOD: (to SABINA) That our actor?
SABINA: (continuing to write on her clipboard) Mmm-hmmm.
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) You’re late.
MARTIN: (looking at his watch, confused) I’m sorry… (to SABINA) Government…access…channel…? My agent was under the impression this was for public broadcast…
ATWOOD: Government access, public broadcast, they’re very similar.
MARTIN: (confused) Not really… one carries Sesame Street…the other scrolls (wrinkling his nose) village news…
ATWOOD: (cutting MARTIN off) Are you in, or would you like me to call one of the other actors who tried out for the role?
MARTIN: No sir, I’m in. I’m sorry. Um…thank you.
ATWOOD: Excellent. Now get into costume quickly. Time is money and money is time and remember (through the bullhorn) you’re already late.
MARTIN: Yes sir. Of course, sir.
SABINA: The script is a work in progress. (SABINA tears a page from her clipboard and hands it to MARTIN) Check it over while you’re dressing. We start as soon as you’re suited up.
MARTIN: Umm…ok.
(MARTIN exits quickly to change. SABINA and DIRECTOR ATWOOD clasp their hands behind their back and begin doo-wopping the Jeopardy theme song. Their heads move in sync with the music – left, center, right, center, left, center, right, center until MARTIN re-enters wearing an Easter Bunny costume.)
MARTIN: (clears his throat) I’m ready sir.
(SABINA and DIRECTOR ATWOOD pop out of their Jeopardy trance. SABINA begins powdering MARTIN’S face with a makeup brush from her back pocket. DIRECTOR ATWOOD pulls up a director’s chair and settles in.)
ATWOOD: Excellent. You look stunning my boy. Absolutely stunning.
MARTIN: I’m a … bunny.
SABINA: (powdering MARTIN’S face) Turn to the right…now the left. Ok thank you. (SABINA puts the brush back into her pocket.) Director Atwood we’re ready to go!
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Ok people, quiet on the set!!
(SABINA kneels in front of MARTIN with a director’s clapboard.)
ATWOOD: Village Easter Commercial take one!!
SABINA: (slaps the clapboard) Roll film…
(SABINA quickly steps out of the way and stands beside ATWOOD.)
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Annnnnd…action!
(SABINA and ATWOOD look on in rapt attention. MARTIN stares into the audience for a moment and takes a deep breath. He sings the following words to the tune of the “Bunny Hop” complete with over-the-top dancing and jazz hands.)
MARTIN: Come to all the parties,
Easter egg rolls,
Make sure that you’re early,
(hopping along to the beat of the song)
To avoid the lines …
(Confetti cannons explode. MARTIN continues dancing, jazz hands, and doo-wopping in the falling confetti.)
ATWOOD: (using the bullhorn) CUT! Cut! Cut! This is all wrong.
SABINA: I’m sorry sir, I thought this was what you wanted.
ATWOOD: (struggling to find the right word) It’s too … it’s too…. sugary. Candy-coated. We need something with substance, and class. Maybe less fur.
MARTIN: (gesturing to the bunny costume) This was not my idea.
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Strike the bunny. (aside) Sabina, re-write the script and send the actor in for costume two.
(SABINA begins scribbling on her clipboard.)
MARTIN: (awkwardly) Hi. I can hear you. I’m standing right here.
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) I need a new costume people!
SABINA: (handing MARTIN a new script) Like I said before, work in progress. Don’t take it personally. Grab whatever’s hanging on hanger two and make it snappy.
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Come on people let’s go!
ATWOOD & SABINA: Time is money and money is time.
(MARTIN exits to change. SABINA and DIRECTOR ATWOOD clasp their hands behind their back and begin doo-wopping the Jeopardy theme song again – this time while performing a simple step-ball-change dance step. MARTIN re-enters holding a large microphone, wearing an oversize wig, bedazzled blazer, and bowtie. He looks understandably uncomfortable in the get-up.)
MARTIN: (stepping back on set) Uh…yoo-hoo?
(SABINA and DIRECTOR ATWOOD pop out of their Jeopardy trance. SABINA begins vigorously brushing MARTIN’S wig. MARTIN is trying to keep the wig on. DIRECTOR ATWOOD inspects MARTIN’S costume.)
ATWOOD: Yes. I love this look. Hair and makeup did well.
MARTIN: (trying to keep his head steady despite the brushing) Why do you guys do that?
SABINA: What?
MARTIN: Sing and dance when I’m gone.
(ATWOOD and SABINA look to the audience in confusion. Beat of silence.)
ATWOOD & SABINA: (looking to MARTIN deadpan) We have no idea what you’re talking about.
ATWOOD: (snapping back, with the bullhorn) Ok people, quiet on the set!!
(SABINA puts the hairbrush away and kneels in front of MARTIN with the director’s clapboard.)
ATWOOD: Village Easter Commercial take two!!
SABINA: (slaps the clapboard) Roll film…
(SABINA quickly steps out of the way and stands beside ATWOOD.)
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Annnnnd…action!
(MARTIN musters up his confidence, looks into the camera, raises the microphone to his mouth, and takes a deep breath. He delivers the following lines in a cheesy radio announcer/game show host voice with lots of energy.)
MARTIN: Don’t let this Easter slip away without experiencing the amazing and incredible events this village has to offer. From egg hunts to breakfast with the big bunny himself, your family will love spending time together, making memories that will last your whole lives through.
(MARTIN takes another deep breath and says the following lines as fast as he can – deadpan – much like the voice-overs on commercials that communicate disclaimers/warnings/hazardous side effects for experimental drugs.)
MARTIN: Dates, times, and events are subject to change without warning. Allowing children to eat enormous amounts of Easter candy can and will have a negative affect on their otherwise pleasant disposition. Side effects include but are not limited to excessive amounts of energy, high pitched screaming, nausea, vomiting, hair pulling, feet stamping, punching, kicking, headache, toothache, dizziness, achiness, general malaise, and temporary insanity…
ATWOOD: (using the bullhorn) CUT! Cut! Cut! (annoyed) What is this?
SABINA: (tapping her pencil to the clipboard) This is still not delivering.
MARTIN: (throws down the microphone, tries to forcibly jerk off the bowtie) You can say that again.
ATWOOD: I don’t understand why we keep missing this…
MARTIN: Are you kidding me? A bunny costume? (struggling to free himself from the bowtie) A bedazzled bowtie? (removing the wig) These are gimmicks, not Easter!
ATWOOD: (scoffs) And what do you know about Easter?
MARTIN: A lot actually.
SABINA: Please. Enlighten us then.
MARTIN: Well first of all it’s not all this commercial hoopla with Easter bunnies and cheesy jackets and male wigs sprinkled over with confetti!
ATWOOD: (frustrated) We already know what we have isn’t working!
MARTIN: (upset) Easter means something really important – to me and to a lot of other people – and I feel like this whole commercial has been a huge joke. (softens) I mean…there’s nothing wrong with all the extra fun stuff to do around this holiday…there’s just so much more to Easter than that.
(ATWOOD and SABINA are confused but listening. MARTIN continues)
MARTIN: Easter is like a love story…
SABINA: I love love stories!
MARTIN: Not that kind of love story…God sent His Son, Jesus, to rescue us …
ATWOOD: (scoffing) Rescue us? From what?
MARTIN: Our poor choices. Our brokenness. All the bad stuff we do to others and the bad stuff we do to ourselves. He came to give us life, and hope, and a future with him. (pause) He came to show us how much He loves us – and that love has changed my entire life. (pause, collecting himself) I’m sorry I’ve realized I can’t do this commercial if it’s just about the gimmick. Maybe you should call one of those other actors…this part isn’t for me…
ATWOOD: What if we give it one more try?
SABINA: Something simple…genuine…real.
ATWOOD: Just tell us your story.
SABINA: I think people will connect with that. I know I have.
ATWOOD: No script this time Sabina. Just Martin. If he’s willing…
MARTIN: (smiling) I can try.
ATWOOD: Well we have nothing to lose at this point. (through the bullhorn) Alright people, quiet on the set!
(SABINA kneels in front of MARTIN with the director’s clapboard.)
ATWOOD: (with emphasis) Martin’s Easter Story. Take one.
SABINA: (slaps the clapboard and walks to ATWOOD) Roll film…
ATWOOD: (through the bullhorn) Annnnnd…action!
(Lights fade. END SCENE.)
Cutting the Commercial out of Easter was written first for an Easter outreach presented by Northwest Assembly of God.